Woo woo!

Most who know me know I have a thing for controlling unpowered planes from a distance via radio-waves. My major hobby (outside of teh Intarwebs) is R/C Sailplanes, and starting this Friday (tomorrow) the 2005 AMA Soaring Nationals, AKA “The NATS”. The Soaring part of the NATS is only one chunk of a 6-week set of events that started July 4th. Over 1,000 pilots will be in attendance for this festival of flight.

The Soaring “genre” encompasses a number of events – Handlaunched gliders, F3J “man-towed” gliders, 2-meter (wingspan) gliders, unlimited gliders (any wingspan allowed), RES (rudder/elevator and spoiler only), and Nostalgia (gliders designed before… 1942? 1962?). Me personally am only flying in the Hand-launch and 2-meter events. I have attended handlaunch contests before, but never at the NATS! I’m excited.

The NATS also draws international competitors as well — and one of my fellow LASS-mates (Gordy) is hosting a gent by the name of Jo Grini who has come all the way from Norway(!) to fly as a part of the LASS team. To quote: “There was not one single place around here that did not have an air conditioner. And when you walk out to 90-95F (33-35celcius) you feel the difference I can tell you.”

I’ll be taking a crapload of pictures, so keep an eye on this site and wish me luck!

Took a late lunch today, and I have this to share:

I don’t know if ALL Thornton’s around town are going to switch over to the abomination that the Blankenbaker Road store have become, but if they do – be forewarned.

I occassionally would walk over there to get a tasty sandwich (of my own choosing) from Subway. The old ladies (angry) who worked there were a constant source of amusement and scorn for us here at Power. “What kinda bread you wont?” “I got 3 different kinda cheese here, honey!” All shaking their fists at the system that has entrapped them and relieved them of their dreams and wishes and what-not. Such was their ire that occassionally they’d Peter North your sandwich, despite your tearful pleas of “go light on the mayo”. This back-and-forth required a certain skill. Those uninitiated were always welcomed to try their hand. Eventually you’d master that skill and you’d get a tasty sandwich of your choosing. This whole human drama, for whatever reason, has been put to an end.

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Gone are the clear sneeze-shield and brass rails that decorated the Subway. Gone is the underground-themed wallpaper. Gone are the 5 loaves of bread to showcase the wealth of choice. Tthis has been replaced with an opaque stainless-steel hood so high that you can’t see the hands of the people making your sandwich. Also, the counter is set some 4 feet back, thus only separating you further from the people that will make your sammich. The real deal-breaker — the real slap in the loaf is this: YOU NOW ORDER VIA KIOSK.

Part of the reason I went to Subway (aside from the cheerful banter with the Subway hags) was to actually SEE my sub being made to the specifications I had previously uttered to the sandwich artist! If I said “hey, I’d like light low-fat mayo” I could see them putting the mayo on there and say “WOAH WOAH WOAH” when I had enough. But now I can’t see the sammich before it’s done and for all I know those ladies could be naked from the waist down (GAH!)

Back to the kiosk… when I was about ready to finish my order, some Thornton’s-clad douchebag strolls up next to me and starts pointing and explaining to me what to do next. I stopped him mid-sentence and said “Thanks, but I think I can handle this.” Turns out he’s some executive from Thorntons. He then tore off my receipt as if I couldn’t do it myself and handed me a coupon to get the deal for the day. All of which were within arms reach to me, and made painfully obvious.

So I get my food, which turned out to be a Turkey Sub and some waffle-cut fries (that was their deal for the day). I noticed they didn’t pull the fries out of a fryer like you would expect, but instead pulled them out of some oven-like contraption. DAMN. That stuff is straight-up frozen! And judging by the wide array of other foods they sell (pizza, toasted subs, corn dogs, etc) most of that crap will be frozen as well. I’ll tell you that I was not looking forward to this sammich at ALL.

The food was acceptable, but only because I paid $3.79 for the whole lot of it. Subway is far, far better and I certainly didn’t get EXACTLY the sammich I wanted like I would have normally. I only plan on going back to attempt to push that crap-worthy system to it’s very limits. Like asking that all the condiments be put on “lightly” and demanding that I see the sandwich after each step. Hopefully my skills of sammich-banter will incite a riot, or at least some accusatory remarks from the former Sandwich Artists that are now relegated to impersonal food contruction. As Charlie put it: “It’s like a vending machine with someone trapped inside” (paraphrase). Yeah, that’s it exactly.

While paying for my food at the main checkout, the cashier and I started up a conversation. As she was struggling with the new computers to run my card through as credit, I remarked “Modern convenience sho’ is grand, isn’t it?” She leaned in close (as to not be heard by the Thornton’s execs) and said “We are all about to friggin’ snap here…”

Note: this is repost of an email I sent out ot my friends. It was well received and made a girl giggle on her birthday, so I guess it’s worthy of mass broadcasting. And yes, while I was formulating this rant I did feel like Pat from Achewood.

Further note: This new-fangled Subway replacement is called SubWorks!. To quote the Thornton’s website: “The SubWorks proprietary food program allows customers to order top-quality sandwiches and other food items via a touchscreen menu—and then to receive orders in three minutes or less.” They forgot to mention the subjugation of human interaction.

I have never really considered myself an expert on much of anything save for “What does Ben think about when he lays down at night?”, but it’s becoming apparent to me that people at here at work consider me an expert in THE INTERNET. Obviously they hired me because I had a working knowledge thereof, but I figured there were people here that knew better than I. I apparently was wrong.

By saying “THE INTERNET”, I use the broadest of terms here because while the Internet is as wide as say, space – you don’t find many people with a Doctorate of Space studies. Perhaps you did when the idea of Space was new, perhaps even 10 years after we realized that we could poke holes in the sky. Now there are many, many specializations in Space Science, like astronomy, astropaleontology, astrophysics, temporal physics, etc. Again drawing from the Space/Internet parallel, there are many different aspects of the ‘web to be knowledgeable in. There are the programmers who create the application that you are using to view this web-page. There are people who do nothing but consider how best to bombard you with ads. There are people who consider how best to shield you from those ads. There are people who agonize over font-sizes, “site-flow”, metrics, returnability, content freshness and all sorts of media dynamics. There are grunts like me who help to create and publish the content created by the great hive-mind that is the marketing world. Somehow, I’ve managed through no real effort to be considered an expert in some of these areas. Lets consider that for a moment.

How did this come to be? Is it just that I had been trapped in the insular world of the I.T. world and didn’t bear to think about the other 99% of people who use the Internet like a toaster-oven? I guess that might be the case. I worked a co-op position for an in-house development staff, so there wasn’t a whole lot of “outside contact”, and then moved onto a job in an web-only agency which expanded and imploded in the Great Boom and Bust. For a period of about 4 years there, I was surrounded by either in-house IT complacency or being held aloft by the dot-com who-needs-the-rest-of-the-pie bubble. It was a little like the whole evolution of IT, condensed. Going from slaving away in a cave to being fired out of a cannon, exploding, then drifting lazily back to Earth. Now that I’m in a world and a time where this Internet technology is finally considered as just another tool in the handy-bag, I’m learning more about the rest of it all and at the same time spreading what knowledge I’ve gained on my albeit short journey. It’s nice to feel wanted.

It’s not to say that there aren’t people here at work who don’t get the Internet (I’m sure there are a few, but they don’t necessarily need to get it), but there are folks who just aren’t confident in their knowledge thereof. Like the toaster-oven analogy before, they know it makes toast, but don’t care and don’t need to know just how hot it gets or why it gets hot in the first place. They come to me and say “so can I cook a pizza in that?” and I respond (as per the usual) with “yes and no”. I am assuming that the next part is where I’ve gotten myself into that “trusted expert” role. I usually then attempt to explain to them why you can or cannot do that, or sometimes even why you shouldn’t do that, and then suggest something completely different, like a bagel. It’s all about understanding a communication.

Too many times, I’ve seen or heard thing that other IT-related folks do that simply make me cringe. I ask “Why do you want to do that?” but with a positively inquisitive tone. I’ve heard on a number of occassions a dismissive slant to that question – think of that character from Saturday Night Live – “Nick Burns – Your Company’s Computer Guy”, and you’ve got it about right. Dang. That just gives IT folks a bad name! The whole reclusive, mind-boggling, superiority-grappling nerd thing is so played it makes me sick. I know it’s hard for people in the IT departments of the world to realize that technology is just a tool and we are but mechanics. I’m talking humility here.

Maybe that is what I’ve been angling for my whole life. The whole mechanic/artist thing. Mixing technology with the intangible to create something more than both. I still don’t think I’m very good at it — that is to say I know folks who are certainly better than I am. But having people look to me for recommendations and information is both nice and bewildering.

No, seriously!

Three years ago today, Kelly and I were married! It has been lots of fun and I love her just as much as I did the day I married her — but now the relationship has a desirable, rich patina to it. Perhaps a better metaphor is like a block of cheese — yes, the cheese has more mold on it, but the cheese is now more stinky. “How on earth is that better, Ben?!” Well, as you may know — the stinkier the cheese, the better the flavor.

So there you have it Kelly! I love our stinky relationship.

A co-worker of mine, who dresses fabulously informed me that local Italian eatery Melillo’s is considering starting up a bocce league of some sort. It’s sort of gelling right now — and I’d say the time is nigh for such developments! Melillo’s already has a bocce pit behind their restaurant, so why not start a league there?

I don’t know why bocce hasn’t “caught on” around town – it really is a “sport” that can be done anywhere. Cholly and I regularly play in the gravel parking lot here at work! Also, it is a sport conducive to drinking (after all, the Italians did invent it). Bocce ball in one hand, glass of wine or pint of beer in the other! Fantastico!

There is a thread on the Louisville Hot Bytes forum entitled “bocce ball league“. If interested, check it out.

There are some people I know – even some readers of this not-so-anonymous blog – who blog about any number of things that would normally be confined to either their subconscious or chatted over a neighbor’s fence (perhaps over a fabulous martini). In the case of work-related gossip, I would wager that if you are going to involve yourself in such an endeavor, it is best to do this anonymously. So, whilst trolling through MeFi earlier this morning, I happened upon a link to the Electronic Frontier Foundation‘s How to Blog Safely (About Work or Anything Else).

One thing they don’t mention here is that any traffic (read: email) that you send using your company’s email servers is their property and so you should not consider your work email “private”. That is what a Gmail account is for!

While they do mention “limiting the audience” of your blog, I have found that unless you restrict your readership manually, anyone and everyone you know will eventually stumble upon your blog. My furthest stretch has been the dairy farmer that lived down the country road in Botetourt County, Virginia, where my great-uncle Joe lives. He mentioned to my Uncle Joe that he had read a website about my and Kelly’s adventures in Eagle Rock, VA. This should underscore how important not giving away your particulars is when attempting to stay anonymous. The careful and intrepid information-seeker will no-doubt attempt to put together a sketch of you through the scraps of info they can find on the internet. For example — I once had a man keep calling my house and requesting that he speak with Pablo Escobar (the now-deceased Columbian druglord). After a pair of short calls, I decided to find out just who my caller was, only armed with his phone number. Thanks to reverse phone directories, Google, and some luck, I found his name, address, his AOL username (which could be contacted via AIM), his homepage, highschool, job history, etc, etc. That turned his next call into an hour-long tango of “I know more about you than you probably ever cared me to know”. I really just wanted the guy to quit calling the house at all hours, but I figured I might as well have fun with it.

So — take care out there on the Intarweb. It is a wild and wonderful place. But, as with most wild and wonderful places, you could be eaten by bears (and by eaten by bears, I mean your job or life could be mauled. Not by bears, but by people who just don’t get the joke).

“With super-powers comes super-responsibility”


– “The Amazing Strobe”

After nearly 6 months of building, I have finally completed my Allegro-Lite sailplane! I started at the beginning of November last year, and just this week finished it up. It’s a great feeling to finally get something like this done, and just in time for soaring season! To celebrate, I have started cleaning up my shop downstairs to make way for the ship I’m going to use for the Louisville Area Soaring Society’s Speed 400 F5J Electric Sailplane Competition coming up in August.

Anyway, back to the Allegro-Lite — it’s a really cool plane, from a completely nerdy point of view. You see — most “competitive” (meaning “efficient”) model sailplanes these days are really expensive — they involve things like hi-load foam, Kevlar, carbon-fiber, and generally a lot of expensive composite materials. Those materials can make things really strong, and yet really light — which is something you need for a really efficient wing on a plane. Well — the Allegro-Lite is an exception because A) it’s made from wood with some carbon fiber (not terribly expensive, B) it is really light and C) despite the previous two things, it is REALLY strong! The design is completely free to the public (courtesy of Dr. Mark Drela from MIT), and there are plenty of other Drela-devotees around to offer help, and in the case of the Allegro-Lite, a near-complete walkthrough. I’ve even pitched in myself with a build gallery with annotations.

So, this summer I intend on getting out and flying as much as I can, and competing as often as I can in regional contests. The Allegro-Lite will be along for the tow as well!

For you, gentle reader, I bring recommendations of rock…

• …And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead, Worlds Apart

  They got my unpublished “Best Name in Rock” award back in 2004, and yeah, so I gave their prior album “Source Tags & Codes” about 2 minutes of attention back in 2003(?), and never listened to it again. Looks like I’m making another of my apologies to rock bands again… Worlds Apart rules in so many varied ways. They’ve got a sorta nerdy thing going on, but they bring the rock right along with it. Archaeology + sociology + rockology = AYWKUBTTOD?

• Death From Above 1979, You’re A Woman, I’m a Machine

  DFA 1979 is two Canadian guys with a synthesizer and a bass guitar. Now, normally, that is usually just spelled out D-I-S-A-S-T-E-R, but not this time, oh no! I think I described it to Najati as “dance-inspired noise rawk”, and I think that just about sums it up. Like 75% noise rawk, 25% ass-shakery. It’s all good.

• Sleater-Kinney, The Woods (Advance Copy)

  Yeah, so I got a copy of this via a lil’ birdie. The girls of Sleater-Kinney have asked very nicely for those folks who are currently dealing it over the intarweb to kindly cut it out. However, since my deed has already been done, and I have listened to it in its entirety — I’ll say this: It rules. In their letter to the pirates, they mentioned that the record “is a response to the deadening and watering down of music”, and I can’t agree more. It’s noisy, loud and far more thrashing as any of their previous records. We likes it very much.

• Sunday Nights – The Songs of Junior Kimbrough

  Junior Kimbrough is credited by Dan Auerbach of the Blakc Keys as “his first record purchase”, and he has created a number of contemporary blues classics that inspired many, from Iggy Pop (who appears on the album with The Stooges) to the White Stripes (not to mention the Black Keys). This various-artists tribute lines up like a hipster funeral wake for Kimbrough. Cat Power, Iggy Pop & The Stooges, Mark Lanegan, Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, etc. Some really fantastic tracks on here, especially from The Stooges, Cat Power and The Black Keys.

…I am in no way a white supremacist or a member of any Aryan group. Further, I would like to thank the intarweb at large for making me have to make statements like that.

It would seem that someone from the intarweb took my posting entitled “the pride of the species” to mean that I endorse Aryanism. Long story short on that posting was that the The Smoking Gun had posted a photo about the “scariest con ever”, and I had related that to my own overly-elaborate plan for the now-legendary “Goat House“, which is (of course) a reality TV-show wherein Death Row inmates battle it out each week in a bleek, unadorned house for a goat which is inserted (dropped through the ceiling) weekly.

You may notice comments from a “Callie” on the sidebar over there. Well, I also received a strange email from a one Calista Alvaraz, the contents are here exposed:

From: Calista Alvaraz

Date: 3/8/2005 5:42 PM

To: ben@XXXXXX

are you proud to be who you are?? i am in jail rite now… doin time for hate crimes are you about you skin as you put out???? let me know what is your deal.. pride power justice supremacy or what?? i am skin for life from a orginization called save our skins or S.O.S hit me up …

So – for the record – I don’t endorse such things, and frankly I don’t see how you could assume that I endorse Aryanism or any sort of white-power credo. I talked about putting him on a show called “Goat House” wherein death-row inmates battled it out for a goat a week for chrissakes. So, sorry, I gave at the office.

P.S. – If you should happen to make it to Death Row, please do contact me regarding “Ladies Goat House”

As much as I hate to do it — I’m putting my Fender Performer 650 guitar amp up for sale on the eBay. One of my first big purchases ever, I bought this thing when I was 17 new with the help of my mum. It was hell-of-loud, and never turned up past 3 (maybe even 2 1/2). Anywho — doing some research on teh intarweb shows that it was and still is a very well-liked amp, being that it’s so loud and only weighs some 40 pounds, has an effects loop, and has TUBED distortion. Tubes! In this day and age! Of course. Nothing beats vacuum tubes when it comes to powering soul-crushing rock machines.

I found a bunch of reviews for it online, and I was pleasantly surprised that it was and is well-liked, well-reviewed, well-respected and maintains a decent resale value. By the way — if anyone within driving distance (50 miles) of Louisville wants it, let me know. We’ll make a deal and forgo the shipping.

Meanwhile, I want this and one of these.