So, while at the Red Bull-sponsored Project Improv show, we all joked about how bull-semen or some bull-testicle related substance was included in Red Bull. I said that “I doubted” if anything of the sort was true. Eve, on the other hand, stated something that I have come to find very true — you never know about some foods, and if you are a vegan as she is, it pays to be cynical. Hunter, sitting between us and realizing that my simple mind is no match for the Vulcan-like logic that Eve possesses quickly interceded.

However — I made a mental note to figure out what WAS in Red Bull. A quick googling found that Snopes, as per usual, is a good place to start when attempting to dispel/prove most any rumor of this sort. Snopes states in this article that Red Bull does NOT include any animal products, “even the taurine is synthetically produced”. It also states that it does not include a banned Vietnam-era substance called glucuronolactone. However, not one to rely on only one source, I searched out other references.

One vegan on the vegan-l yahoo list gives us a link to the Red Bull FAQ which states that “Red Bull® Energy Drink is suitable for vegetarians. Red Bull® Energy Drink does not contain any animal products or substances derived from animals.”

Here is a Business week article briefly stating a doctor’s opinion of the stuff. Interested in this whole synthetic taurine thing, I found a number of links to vegan pet foods, including this one, which states “All pet food manufacturers use synthetic taurine, being both easier to use and more economical. I use synthetic taurine in my vegan cat food.”

In my estimation, Red Bull appears safe –
HOWEVER — all of this does not save Red Bull from smelling and tasting like the bile of the Stay-Puf Marshmellow man. It is sickly-sweet, and frankly I’d rather have a cup of coffee which a) costs less and b) probably has more caffeine. Or maybe just some bathtub crank. After all, if you made it in your own bathtub you know whats in it.